claire_e

do you ever wonder about what you were doing and who you appear to be in the memories other people have of you? 

i am thinking about this guy i see every once in a while during bright sunny days.  he lingers on the sidewalk by the same stoplight in one of the busiest streets of the city where i live.  dressed like a runner he sweats like one as he holds a sign pointing to some nearby store.  this sign bounces and his teeth radiates from this bobbling head as he sings with the white cords that hang from his ears.  and i think to myself...no...i know...that he is someone i will remember my entire life even if i will never know why he is always so happy to be holding that heavy sign under the hot afternoon sun.  because i am in awe at the simplicity of his joy.  because i am in awe at how easy it is for him to make me smile even when i have no clue who this stranger actually is and he has know clue that i have him memorized.

this internet thing is so vast and I have a vague nearly non-existent idea of everyone im reaching with this page.  but im not some naïve girl that just posts stuff about herself on here without the worry that i may be sharing too much of myself.  i worry.  ive had certain life experiences that give me a good reason to be afraid to do that...trust me.  yet here's the thing.  i aspire to be that guy i see in the street on bright sunny days.  a person who people i may never know can pass by and see someone who doesn't treat a moment like an entire life that's veiled in the scary stuff, even when in all honesty it is.  ive always believed our individual role as part of the human race is to be a chameleon.  not so much in its simplicity to blend, but rather its tenacity towards its purpose.  that is, to take the best of its environment so that it becomes a part of something bigger and more beautifully distracting than the intentions of a single threat.

"Well relationships change,
Oh I think it's kinda strange,
How money makes a man grow.
Some people they claim,
If you get enough fame,
You live over the rainbow.
Over the rainbow..

But the people on the street,
Out on buses or on feet,
We all got the same blood flow.
Oh, in society,
Every dollar got a deed,
We all need a place so we can go,
And feel over the rainbow"

- Amos Lee, Keep It Loose Keep It Tight